If I could say just one thing to my birthmother it would be “thank you!” My name is Dan and I was adopted at birth into an amazingly supportive, loving and positive household. I grew up with two amazing parents and an older sister, all who’ve helped shape me into the man I am today. The reason I would say thank you is because without my birthmother’s incredibly selfless decision to put me up for adoption, I would have never known this amazing life I have now.
Growing up I always knew I was adopted and it was never a topic in our family that was off limits. Several of my family members have their own adoption stories. Each very different than my own. Mine began at birth, but for me it starts with a very specific memory. I’m not sure how old I am, but I am sitting on our piano bench across from my parents in a dress (so it must have been a Sunday because I would not be wearing one otherwise) telling me I was adopted, explaining to me what that meant, and asking if I have any questions. My only response, “Nope! Can I go play now!?”
Over the years, I was curious and had questions. My parents always made themselves available to answer my questions or made sure I knew I could go to anyone in our family. My parents never forced the subject, but my mom always seemed to know when to bring up the subject and talk about my adoption even if I didn’t want to. My parents always had positive things to say about my birth mother and her family. They were always honest, caring, positive, serious and provided humor when it was needed. I think their attitude has provided me with the same outlook and a realization that my adoption doesn’t define me. It is a part of my history they have helped me to embrace.